Well at 31 weeks here she is although I will be 32 weeks this week I think. Gosh time is flying. The top picture is a picture of her feet, I keep getting feet pictures! The bottom is one of her sort of lying face down and if you look very carefully on the right at the top you can actually see hair, it looks like tufts of grass! She has loads apparently. I have never been a believer really in the old wives tale that lots of hair gives you heartburn as I thought Josh had lots of hair and never suffered it with him, but with this baby have had quite bad heartburn and having never been a suffer of it, it really sucks!
She has moved head down - YAY - for now though has been moving so much who knows where she is now. So my gynae Marie was happy that she had moved from transverse to head down as provided she stays there they do not need to turn her. Hannah is 2.12kg already and I have about 8 weeks of pregnancy or so left, although I take these weights from these machines with a pinch of salt as Josh was supposed to be ginormous over 4kg and he was born 3.67. so there is a variance on the machines of about 15%. Hannah has long legs apparently so am now getting excited to see how she looks in her own right, I feel so bad that I have not revelled much in this pregnancy as much as I did with Josh, but it is just not the same when you have a toddler to look after already. I am hoping that I get a few days alone at home before she decides to make an appearance - to bond a bit with her in my tummy. I am hoping to finish up with work on the 10th September which doesnt leave me with much time but need to work as long as possible in order to get some income in. My gynae says that there is a good chance that she will come a week or so early like Josh, especially since she is a good weight. I just hope my gynae is around for it this time!
I have decided to go for a butterfly themed nursery with pinks and whites - but have not had much of a chance to do anything about it, except I have bought a beautiful white cot duvet and pillow set with butterflies on it, so need to try sort the rest of nursery out and then sort Josh's room out for him too so he doesnt feel left out. Also need to hunt for a present for him from the 'baby' I think that this is a nice gesture and would like it to be something special so any ideas would be appreciated.
And that is all for now, as my countdown gets nearer and nearer and I am getting bigger and bigger, September is around the corner. I can say I am looking foward to being on Maternity Leave in spring and being able to go for walks etc, and revel in the sunshine!

Before I forget, a big Congrats to purple ronnie on the news of her pregnancy! Amazing news, a truly amazing blessing from God! Falling pregnant naturally after having to have fertility treatment previously is truly a blessing, wishing you much happiness with this new addition to the family, it seems the pregnancy bug is in the air again...beware :-) I already know of someone else preggers....so it is definitely in the air - but my lips are sealed for now!

xxxx

The Republic of Hout Bay

Here are some pictures of our day out:

This past weekend we had spectacular weather, we paid a visit to our friends Gavin and Catherine in the Republic of Hout Bay.. they have their own passport you know :-)

We had a horrendous weekend with Joshua he has 4 molars coming through (high temperatures, whining and crying, kicking and screaming, not eating etc etc etc) and I wasnt well on Friday with cramps and backache so on Saturday decided to get out a bit to have a break from being indoors before I went totally insane. So we took a drive to Hout Bay to the harbour, which Joshua absolutely loved, the boats, the water, the seagulls, and yes even the Hout Bay Hillbillies, of which there were a few on the pier by the harbour.... Then we popped in at Gavin and Catherine and the kids played for awhile together whilst we had a delicious lunch and caught up. Catherine and I are a month apart pregnant so we have lots to chat about and both with small toddlers, we can have a good natter about all our trials and tribulations.

Our nanny is back at work for the interim, I still need to sit down and discuss the changes in her employment but absolutely loved the fact that I came home to a clean house last night and today she is repacking Joshua's wardrobe and sorting out the clothes sizes that are too small and clearing the compactum for Hannah...bliss...

As for me I am now 31 weeks pregnant and have a gynae visit tomorrow so hopefully she has turned she feels a bit lopsided today but its anyones guess until tomorrow how she is lying all I know is that my back is killing me and had sciatica nerve pain the other day have definitely been having Braxton Hicks contractions quite scary I must say. So will do a post on update tomorrow or the following day. In the meantime here is a picture of my GROWING belly:

76 days and counting

2 months and 16 days until my due date of 24th September. This baby is coming early...I am convinced..I am not willing it by any means, but it is a feeling. And I am most unprepared. Nothing and I mean nothing, apart from booking my hospital bed, has been done. This time pregnant with Joshua I know a lot more had been done. I havent started the nursery, I dont have a hospital bag packed or stuff even purchased for it. For example the lovely maternity brooks and maternity pads (sorry if that is TMI for the male readers) but reality. Bra pads, etc etc etc. I am feeling like already the 2nd child syndrome has settled in and she isnt even here yet. I feel so unprepared for this pregnancy and birth, and the fact that she is lying transverse is not making me feel any better as I really want another natural birth.
Speaking of which I have got some really interesting advice and tips to turn her, though at 29 weeks it is still a bit early.

Here are some of the tips:

1. Chocolate and Coke - tried that for the 4d scans - no go, she is a girl she loves chocolate why would I move, I am just going to snuggle down and enjoy.
2. Bouncing on a bouncy ball - need to get one of those
   
3. Doing the Bridge
4. Shining a light/torch by your bum and/or vaj jay jay (I dont think so!)
   
5. Getting your husband to talk down by your pubic bone....hahaha
6. Handstands in a swimming pool
   
7. A tight pair of cycling shorts that fit across your tummy snuggly

So I am giving it till my next appointment at 31 weeks and then just may do most of these par from shining the torch thing, that just seems a bit too much for me!

This past week I went for my free 4D scan as part of the Medi-Twinkle program, Clive did not come with as he couldnt get off work, so I went on my own. Just as well as she would not budge and all I saw was blur and a half a profile with an arm that looked like jelly as she moved it too quickly up and away as if to say 'Leave me the hell alone'.

I got a good response to a facebook comment from my sister in law / Clive's sister Gina:
"They say, your first child is what you want... the second is what you deserve :) ...hope you were good!" Haha enjoyed that.
Baby Hannah is 1.333kg already, I hope that is normal, Clive says she is a little fatty, I told him he is a big fatty and not to give her a complex already :-) You see us woman already even in the womb get told we are too big at 1.333kg!!!

Other than that life is pretty hectic, I am tired most of the time and fetching and carrying Josh to daycare is hard he is adjusting slowly still some tears now and again. He is getting so clever, now when we arrive at daycare and I take him out the car with his bag he starts moaning and says 'home'. He knows where home is as when we drive in the complex now he says 'home'. I know that they are too young for interactive play that they parallel play at the moment but am looking forward to when he has little friends and he wants to go to play with them. It is hardwork taking care of him, the house, seeing to supper, washing etc, and there are just not enough hours in the week when I am at home to see everything and find it frustrating that we have a pile of washing and dishes in the sink - I was spoilt having our domestic there everyday I suppose. All I had to do was come home and start supper and play with Josh, and in the mornings I could just leave for work - no more there are a host of things to do in the morning. Get myself and Josh dressed and off. My husband is in for a surprise this weekend I told him we are drawing up a roster as because I get home earlier I am doing the majority of the work, i.e. stop at shop for bread / milk / other items, get home feed Josh, unpack his bag, pack his bag for the next day, tidy up a bit, make the beds, sort out washing, run the bath, start supper.. and so it goes on day in day out whilst mister dad gets home gets to play a bit with Josh and bath him and tada thats it. Bladdy ridiculous if you ask me so things are going to be a changing!!! Watch this space. That is before we add another infant into the mix with a breastfeeding mommy who is going to be even more sleep deprived than she already is... fun and games.
Have a great weekend all, I know I am I am not doing a thing this afternoon or tomorrow - am going to just rest and to hell with the housework I am playing with my boy and taking a nap when he does!! So there. (Please let me stick to this plan :-) )
xxxx

Independance Day

So today is the 1st of July 2009 and not a good day in the life of Josh's mom.

Today Joshua started daycare. There are really no words to describe how I feel and dont want to get too upset at my desk had that day yesterday, and more 'snot en trane' this morning. I know I am not the first mom to do this and millions have done it before me, but for me this is HUGE, I like being in control, I am organized, there is always a plan. To drop my child off at a 'strangers house' with a bunch of other kids was not an easy task, unfortunately I have had no choice, like millions of mom's before me who work and cannot stay at home at look after their children. It is a horrible feeling. [Ok tea break as the eyes are welling again.]

With my nanny being booked off for a further 4 weeks for her leg, I needed to have a more permanent solution and cannot have family looking after him indefinitely, and could not delay longer as who knows if she gets booked off for longer after her next check up. It has left me in quite a predicament as we cannot have both the nanny and daycare. So have had no option but to go for the daycare as he needs to be looked after. So after doing some research as I do and going to see a couple of places, some really not nice, one with a swimming pool(I ask you?), one with a lady who looks after 12 toddlers on her own...is that legal? I finally found a place that I felt comfortable with, that was not overally big and crowded, with two really nice ladies that run it who have put a lot of effort and small touches in their daycare, called Babyland in Parklands. Whilst there having a look I bumped into an old neighbour who's new baby goes there and who's 5 yr old went to them previously. They only take from 3 months to 3 years. I felt a bit better knowing someone who takes their child there and are happy with them. Of course I was sobbing as I dropped him off this morning and Dee the lady was very sympathetic and not 20 minutes after I left, she sms'd me to say that Joshua was fantastic that he was already playing with a new friend and if I am upset at all I must please phone, but she will look after him for me. Which helped a bit. I have taken half day today and tomorrow so that I can pick him up a bit earlier so it is not such a long day for him.

No one can understand until they are a mother how much you long to protect and safeguard your children and how it hurts to let them go a little at a time, and this will carry on way into the rest of his childhood and adulthood. Why do we let ourselves in for this ? The smile, the kiss the 'love you mommy' the cuddle in the morning and Josh's latest 'my mummy'. That is why I know. Being a mom is rewarding but today it is tough!

Fathers Day

To my husband and the father of my little boy and little girl "to be". Happy Fathers Day. I know it was on Sunday and today is Wednesday but nevertheless wanted to preserve the day on my blog. Thank you for being an 'involved' dad, thank you for loving your son, thank you for the help you give me. I know I complain a lot and expect a lot of you but you truly are a wonderful dad to your son and love him so much. We are in for a rocky but adventurous ride ahead with the second child on the way and am sure that she is going to enlarge your capacity to love and that she will be daddy's little princess. Happy Fathers Day.
p.s. hope you enjoyed your fathers day present of playing golf the whole day :-)

Got these via email and though they were sweet.

A dad is someone who catches you when you fall, then picks you up, brushes you off and tells you to try again.

A dad is someone who wants to keep you from making mistakes but instead tells you to find your own way and make your own decisions.

A dad is someone who will hold you when you cry, shines with pride when you succeed and has faith in you even when you fail.
A dad’s life is sometimes very busy, but he always makes time to help you with your homework or to just play a fun game before bedtime.
A dad boldly faces the ups and downs of life and encourages the family that everything will be fine.
A dad is a superhero in the eyes of their children.

"Walk a little slower, Daddy,”
Said a little child so small.
"I'm following in your footsteps,

And I don't want to fall.

Sometimes your steps are very fast,

Sometimes they're hard to see;

So walk a little slower, Daddy,
For you are leading me.

Someday when I'm all grown up,

You're what I want to be;

Then I will have a little child

Who'll want to follow me.

And I would want to lead just right,

And know that I was true
So, walk a little slower, Daddy,

For I must follow you."

Drained

Dont really like posting negative posts but that is the reality of life: Up's, Downs and In Betweens. I am feeling very drained at the moment. Admittedly a lot has been going on so I know the cause in addition to my body carrying another 'being' which it has to carry for the remainder of the next 4 months. But really - I am exhausted, it is becoming an effort to just sit at my desk and do my work and concentrate on remembering things. It would help if I could remember to take my multivitamin and omega 3 tablets religously, but even this I am forgetting from time to time. All the magazines say eat healthily, exercise, dont forget to take care of yourself pamper yourself... who writes these articles ? Real Woman? I dont think I am the exception to the rule, pregnancy is not all glowing beaming women... Pregnancy and day to day living can be hardwork.

So in between all the moving and selling of our previous home and our nanny breaking her leg and having to find someone to look after Josh and running a home - a higgeldy piggeldy one at that due to the move - all I want to do is to crawl into bed at about 6:30pm - fat chance of that! At leaving work at 15:45 each day which I know is great as some people work until 5, it doesnt mean that I get home and lounge around. En Route I stop at the shops get what is needed for dinner / supplies for Josh / bread and milk, which takes about 20 minutes or so get in the door, plonk groceries down, give my boy a kiss, unpack said groceries, ask how his day has gone, sit with him for a few minutes hopefully with a toy or a book. Get up get his food ready for dinner, feed him, give him some fruit. Then have to get supper going 9 out of 10 times during the week, as Clive normally only gets home around 6:30pm or so sometimes later. Run my boy a bath, start to bath him (get clive if he is home to lift him out of the bath for me as my back aches doing that) dress him whilst perhaps clive oversees the rest of the cooking process for supper. Make his bottle. Try and read to him or interact a bit quietly before bedtime. Give bottle and hope that he just drifts off, if not another half an hour or so to get him to sleep.

And then we cross our fingers that he doesnt wake during the night ..... or very early, my son is an early riser ... pretty much 5am - 5:30am every morning.....!

So universe out there, do you see why I am so tired.....oh yes and in 4 months time add another baby to the picture. I dont mean to complain, I know children are blessings, I know that time flies and I will long for these days again and miss them but right now I would love to just have a break and get away... somewhere quiet where I dont have to be up at the crack of dawn and still see a whole day at the office. But such is life, I AM grateful for ALL I have, I have more than many many out there..... am just offloading my tiredness into the blog universe and hopefully will feel a bit better and refreshed.

1 Year 2 months old - Some pics

I have been a bit slack at uploading and even taking pics, I have still not yet taken a picture of myself pregnant with Hannah (Terrible I know).
Here are some pictures of Josh taken relatively recently. He is my little munchkin, I am really LOVING this age, I love the little words and the walking and the snuggling into me. It makes so much of the worlds problems fade away, when he leans over to give me a kiss I never asked for.
Without further adieu, here are the pics.
xxx
p.s. We moved into our new house this weekend and are both shattered and there is still a lot to do, my nanny has broken her leg and now we have no childcare from next week on luckily we have grandparents looking after him this week until we get sorted...sigh it never rains but it pours.

22 Weeks and the Beating

I am now 22 weeks pregnant or 5 and a bit months pregnant. Yesterday was the foetal assessment scan where they check all the organs etc, and you go to a qualified sonographer who no one told me would BEAT me up! Good grief, my tummy is so sore today. Apparently our little girl was lying in a transverse postion head down and she needed to move to get some good shots. My poor little girl had her hands in front of her face as her mom had her stomach pushed, slapped and 'beaten' then she moved to cover her ears. It was really a sight to see, Engela the lady said she is a stubborn one. Would not budge. Good for her... bad for me, I swear I am going to have bruises. The things we do for our kids! All is well with her and she is developing nicely, due date is apparently between 21-24 September and she weighs 550g at the moment. I feel very heavy and stretched but perhaps that is because she is lying horizontally against me. I must say I could see from the 4d scan immediately that she 'looks' different to Josh did at that scan which I know is obvious that they would look different but mostly in these scans you dont see too much detail. It's funny though when I look back at Joshua's 3d scans there are elements that I recognize in his facial features now. Weird but true.

Now I am busy debating when to take maternity leave I am tempted to work until Fri 11th September but am worried that if she comes a week early I will only have 1 week off before she arrives. It is such a dilemma as ideally I want to spend as much time at home with her and not 'waste' a month if she decides to come late. But also will have to see how I feel around that time, I also would like to spend a bit of quality time with Josh before my time has to be shared. So really not sure at this point in time.

This weekend we move into our new house, there is lots to do, do I feel like it ... No! Does it matter how I feel ... No.. it still has to be done. Sigh abracadabra ...poof I wish it was all done already, furniture still there yip. So we will move on Saturday out of our home for 4 years that housed my first baby and first nursery. We will leave behind the beautiful Peter Rabbit border that Clive made and start over with Josh's room and the new nursery.

I will leave you with the very unflattering not so nice pics of our baby girl at the 4d scan yesterday she really struggled to get a good picture of her.

Half Way.....

Well if you can believe it I am already half way through my second (and last :-)) pregnancy! 20 weeks has arrived. With it came a heavy dose of Bronchitis and flu and have never been as ill in my life before as I felt last week. The doctor booked me off for the entire week and had to take antibiotics, cortisone etc, which I didnt like having to do whilst pregnancy but my gynae was adamant that I had to get better in case I got worse to which the doctor agreed. I still have a bit of a lingering cough and am quite tired lately as there is lots on the go, we move in the next 2 weeks and I have only packed 4 boxes. I am hoping that we can just move stuff across and that the weather plays along and it doesnt decide to rain the day we need to move the big stuff. I have also just started experiencing pain in my right foot sort of between the 2nd and 3rd toe upward and my foot has been a bit swollen...oh the joys...! So have a bit of a limp at the moment and it is quite painful, this should be fun moving and having a limp and a tummy. Speaking of which I need to remember to take pics of this bump so that little Hannah doesnt feel left out later on.

Joshua is doing well and is starting to really get brave with walking on his own from one place to another he lets go of the couch and takes 5- 6 steps to the next and is very pleased with himself afterward, the only stumbling block I seem to have at present with him, is his reluctance to eat non-mushed food - he still loves his 'woolies puree' and though I have given him plenty to try he is not mad about it - especially rice, he picks it out his mouth instead of chewing ... very frustrating. I wish there were more helpful sites out there that could guide moms on the whole solid foods experience, portion sizes, but it seems that most often than not they tell you to let your child guide you. Even my paedetrician says not to make meal times a battle as it will become a force of wills and more often than not the moms lose.

Other than life being very busy at the moment and winter being almost upon us, damn it is cold in the mornings, life carries on, new presidents are named, and the closer I get to having baby no. 2 with us where I am sure we are going to be challenged in all sorts of ways and means
but am looking forward to seeing her little face and seeing who she looks like and what sort of baby she will be compared to our first experience, the most important thing is that she will be her own person in her own right, not to be compared to anyone.

Have a great Tuesday all
xxx

Why?

It is a question that I am going to have to often as a mum answer to my children one day... why this mommy why that... and am in a way looking forward to that. But even as I look forward to those innocent enquiring questions from my kids, it is sometimes heartbreaking to know that I will not always be able to answer it....
It is with a bit of a somber heart that I blog today. A very good friend of mine, actually my best friend since college days way back in 1996, is going through a personal journey of heartache and I really feel sad for her today. Her dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer a few months ago literally, and has steadily declined and today I have learnt from her that he is in a coma and there is not much time left. Why? Why him at the young age of 60 odd, why him before they (Andrea and Brent) have had children so that he could meet his grandkids, why has he suffered so, why was it so quick, why not others? The truth is there is no answer. As someone whom most of you know is religious / or as I prefer to put it 'have a personal relationship with God' as opposed to a 'religion' - cannot answer. Most of the time I am quite strong and quite happily accept that we cannot know the answer to all things in life, that God knows all and His plans are carried out in His timing for His reasons.
I still however ask this question for her, for Andrea, as my heart breaks that she will have to go through the heartache of saying goodbye to her dad, something that if nature takes its natural course we will all have to do one day to all of our parents. She has been praying non stop that her dad would recover from this and be able to have treatment, but it seems this has not been possible, the cancer was just too far gone. Today he is in a coma and not responsive anymore to them anymore.
Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers together with her mom who is close to losing her life partner way sooner than what she expected.
So these are the questions as a mom that I know that I will come across eventually within the period of my kids growing up... the explanation of life and death, what is important in life and what is not. I dont know all the answers myself but what is important is what you do with your time, who you spend it with and what you ultimately leave behind - not 'things' but values and memories and 'time' with those you love. Uncle Gideon our thoughts are with you and your family and thank you for raising two spectacular daughters!!!

The Bad the Good and the Excellent

The Bad news is I have been absent from blogging for a while. The Good news is that we recently had a lovely long weekend and that it is already Wednesday which means effectively 1 more day until the WEEKEND. And the excellent news is we found out yesterday that we are expecting a little GIRL.
In between all of that I have celebrated my 31st Birthday on Good Friday, had Joshua's first Easter and had my 17 week scan yesterday where my gynae gave us the good news. I think Clive is very proud he is having a girl, and I am so pleased to be blessed with both a boy and a girl. I could not believe how she has grown and she has the longest legs ever, Josh had muscular legs which you could even see on the scan but she has such long legs, I am still amazed that I have not felt movement yet, though apparently the placenta is quite thick under my nerves by my tummy and that is why. All is well and is as it should be, the next scan will be our foetal assesment scan which is the big one they do to check organs etc. Also had to have blood tests yesterday to check iron levels etc. as am feeling drained and tired, but something tells me that is more to do with being a mom to a toddler already....
So Hannah it is then, she has been Hannah since I was pregnant the first time, it is strange as we did not even have a boys name and I strongly felt I was having a girl, I didnt want to be too vocal as didnt want to jinx it or convince myself as that is what I wanted. But in any event I feel incredibly blessed. It is as if she was always meant to be we were just waiting for her to arrive, if that makes any sense. So now I will begin the process of going through the clothes I kept of Joshua's see if anything is unisex and I will more than likely donate the rest to Ubuntu House in Goodwood a home for babies. I cant believe I will soon be at the halfway mark of this pregnancy, it is really flying by.
We also said goodbye to Jack and Tanya who were down from the UK for a month - although didnt spend half as much time with them as I would have liked it was still great to meet him and catch up with Tanya. Am posting some pics of them and of Josh on Easter Sunday at home, he had the tiniest taste of the chocolate egg, but that was it this mommy is strict on chocolate and sweet stuff.
Wishing you all a enjoyable rest of the week and hurry up Friday!

Josh on the Hunt (not like it was really hard)

Hmm what is this mummy?

Chocolate for me ... no you can have it mummy

Me and Jack Carter

Me Josh and Jack

Tanya and Josh

1st Birthday

Ok so this post is late, but have been meaning to post it for the last couple of days.
Joshua had his 1st Birthday party and it was a lovely day. It was warm, there were plenty of children and this pregnant mom was actually quite exhausted as I had not slept well the night before. I had so badly wanted to make Joshua cupcakes with no. 1's on them but when it got to the night before (I had bought the ingredients and everything) and it was 7:30pm and I was still doing some party packs - I just couldn't face baking on top of that. So he didnt get them and I will live with the mommy guilt until the next party.

He was so spoilt and was finished by the end of it, so was I as I had a serious puking attack after the party - due to the heat probably and the running around and a particularly horrendous nappy that Josh had done which just set me off, so was feeling very sorry for myself.

I feel as though the nausea is tapering off and not quite as severe still feel ill a bit but not as bad.

On Josh's actual birthday the family went through to The Barnyard which I had heard of through Catherine for some tea and scones and for Josh to have a bit of a play. Catherine and Max joined us and we had a nice time, though to be honest there were more pigeons there than any farm animals :-) Clive and I took the day off for this as I have decided and hope that I can stick to it that Josh will not spend a birthday alone with a nanny and without me until he starts school. Although now I will have another 'birthday' that will have to be off for too at least the months will be far apart i.e. March and September.

So that is me for now work is busy, we are in the process of all that goes along with selling a home and starting in a brand new one again and have daily work so life is busy but we are blessed so till next time.

Baby Lammer 2

9 weeks
13 weeks



Hi All,
Yesterday was our 13 week scan. Unfortunately Clive could not make it but had my gran go with me with Josh to it. Firstly I could not believe how fully formed the baby was and how much bigger from the last scan! I mean the last scan was a little coffee bean, now I saw a fully fledged little baby. Modern Technology is amazing, granted it was enlarged as she / he is only 7cm and 70g but still!
Baby was moving around like anything, my gran was amazed it was the first time that she had seen anything like it, in her day they just felt the stomach and put a horn thing apparently on the stomach to hear heartbeat and that was your ante-natal check up.

I did ask when we would see the sex of the baby, for definite at the next scan. She did get a look between the bottom and said it was too early to tell, but she thought it could be a girl, but no guarantees till the next scan. I must say I feel it is a girl but will wait and see before having any expectations.

This weekend is Joshua's 1st Birthday party with some kiddies nothing big so think of me as I have loads to do for Saturday when all I feel like doing is putting my feet up with a good book. I just never seem to get around to it.

I cant believe my little baby is almost a year, next week on the 24th it will have been a whole year. I want to slow the growth down but also enjoy all the new milestones and expressions and personality that is coming through. I suppose yes I will have that 'small little baby' soon enough with the new addition, but it is not the same.

More things that are happening in our lives at the moment is that Clives folks a.k.a Heather and Ford and the kids more than likely will be moving to New Zealand. It is a huge thing, we wish it didnt but life is never stagnant and change is always inevitable. Life has taught me that just when you think things are going along smoothly - a bump in the road called life happens. We dont want them to go but we want them to go if it is what they desire and wish for. In any event it is going to have a major impact on our lives. Clive's especially, it is his whole family that will be thousands of miles away, and we cannot just pop around or have them look after Josh for us. So it is going to be very tough if it all comes through.

This week is a very busy week have my gran down from PE, a friend down from London with her baby Jack that I have yet to meet, more friends down from JHB, so things are rather busy at the moment, but hope to upload some photos soon. In the meantime here are two pics of baby lammer 2 at 9 weeks and then yesterdays scan at 13 weeks.
Have a great week all

12 weeks Exactly

Today I am officially 3 months into my 2nd pregnancy. No miraculously I did not unfortunately wake up this morning and feel instantaneously better. In fact I felt terrible this morning and was convinced I would actually throw up. Sigh I know it is actually a good sign that you have morning sickness, but I have had enough. So angels up there please can it stop soon and the pregnancy just continue to progess smoothly.

Last night I went with purple ronnie to see family life's new addition Nina May and she is so beautiful. You just forget how tiny new borns are. She was quite alert when we arrived and I thought she had such lovely colour skin and so clear, and tiny hands with long fingers. Brought back so many memories of having Josh - and being them being in the same hospital I suppose. I really want to try and enjoy this pregnancy now as this is the last time that I am doing this - 2 is the limit.

Other than that we got some good news our house has been sold and it looks like we will be moving either the 1st May or 1st June. So lots ahead to do.

Today is also our 4 year Wedding Anniversary, though we have been together 10 years now. It is also a friend of ours birthday, Kim Nell, so Happy Birthday to Kim and to my husband, a very happy anniversary, thank you for all that you do for me and our family, I love you xxxx

Have a happy Thursday it is weekend tomorrow - yay!

Heat Wave

How hot has it been the past few days, I have found it to be unbearable and just adds to the nausea. Yesterday took the cake really. As I commented on Family Life I have been thinking about Caroline a lot in this heat as I remember how I struggled with Josh in the heat being heavily pregnant. The swimming pool was the only thing that got me through I think.

So in a way I am looking forward to being heavier in winter this time around, although have no winter maternity clothes from previously apart from jeans. The all day sickness is getting a little very little bit better, but still feel yucky at night. And even more so when it is really hot and I havent had something to eat in awhile, but as I said to a friend who feels like eating in this weather, I can just manage fruit and water most of the time. I am now 11 weeks pregnant and still fees a bit surreal at times, probably because I am so occupied with how sick I feel and with Joshua that poor new little bean doesnt get too much thought at this stage.

We havent had any news on the sale of our house we were supposed to hear this week if the purchasers buyer had received bond approval but we have not heard anything as yet as they are an Eskom employee and gets done inhouse with subsidies etc. Other than that we celebrated Clive's granny's 80th birthday this week and are off to Boschendal for lunch tomorrow - I was hoping to sit outside but with this heatwave we have elected to sit in the airconditioned restaurant. So heres hoping I can eat tomorrow and enjoy the buffet selection that I have heard so much about.

Hope you all have a great weekend xxxxx

De Ja Vu

Well for those not in the know, I have discovered a short awhile ago that I am pregnant again. Unplanned, unexpected, but nevertheless pregnant. I was waiting for my first scan to ensure that all was ok before saying too much but that was done last Thursday and have let the proverbial cat out of the bag.
Am I shocked - yes. Am I prepared - no. Am I concerned - Yes. but what can I do it cannot be undone and we did always want two children I was just not counting on it being so close together.
I was also not counting on feeling as terrible as I do. The 'morning' sickness is much worse and is all day sickness and more so at night, I am struggling to eat, and have a 11 month old who is demanding and still need to have my wits about me at work. To say I am feeling very sorry for myself at the moment is an understatement. I had exactly 2 hours sleep last night as Josh was awake from 12:30am to 4pm, why I have no idea except I was very frustrated and am very tired tonight. So we are in for the long haul. Fingers crossed it is a girl as I am not going to have a 3rd - it is just too much. Have been bad at posting pics as havent take many lately so have one or two of Josh from the other day which I have posted above.
xxx
xxxx

Decisions....

Once again I have to apologise for neglecting my blog, I know how I feel when no-one posts and it is the same story at the top that has been there for 3 weeks. So sorry that I have put you through that.

I have been absent from blogging for a couple of reasons, mainly because life is very busy at the moment and lots is going on in my head. The days fly by and before I know it, another week has gone by. What has been happening is trying to sell our home, and that as those of you who have had to do this, is very painstaking, stressful, irritating all in one as you have to deal with estate agents, short notice visits, sunday after sunday show houses. And most importantly the house has to be always neat and tidy. Not that we arent neat and tidy people (well not really with a toddler now) but it is irritating nonetheless. So we have had 2 offers now and decided to take the one which we signed off this morning. It is a huge step. It wasnt an easy decision to make.. We love our home - we have put a lot of hard work and effort into it making the small changes, the garden the pool etc. But I did know that it wasnt going to be the house forever as once we started a family we may need to move on. It isnt an easy thing, as I dont particularly like change I dont know if that is an Aries thing or not, but I like things to be safe as they are and know what is around the corner. As a grown up I know that that is impossible and the only thing that we can be certain of is that there will be change sooner or later, ups and downs, good times and bad.

So although the deal is signed it is subject to sale of their property and we have a month to see if that will work out else we may lose the home that we have put an offer in on with Garden Cities. I am content to say that if it is meant to be it will be, but must be honest it is a lot to think about, moving, packing, costs involved, the whole selling process with attorneys and a buyer is not something we have dealt with before. When we purchased this home we did so from the developer and were new buyers and that was that. So things are rather complicated now.

I hope we have made the right decision it will be a push for us as it is a bigger home with a bigger bond, but we are taking the step in faith and trust that we will be able to handle whatever is around the corner. So that readers is part of the reason I havent been blogging.

Other than that the Lammer family is well and hope to post some updated pics of our busy little boy who is almost 1!!!!
Love Me
xxx

It been awhile

Its been awhile since I posted. It is really more that I am trying to get back into the swing of things work wise and routine wise with Josh who at the moment is just not sleeping very well at night, every night is also becoming a huge indaba to get him to go to sleep. I think that he is teething - he now has another front tooth that has come through so he officially has 4 teeth, but it is really frustrating trying to get him to sleep for over a hour and half sometimes at night and then he can wake at about 2/2:30 and may stay up for an hour and a bit before going back to sleep. I am getting seriously sleep deprived and very very tired during the day and just about exhausted by the time I actually get home.
Josh will be 10 months old on 24th January and I am pretty soon going to have to be planning the 1st Birthday party - can you believe it!!! I am loving the stage he is at, at the moment as he is so interactive with us and so inquisitive with everything.
I love when in the morning he is half a sleep and groggily puts his head on my chest or tummy whilst gurgling to himself. I love when he raises his one eyebrow as if to say 'really mum?' I love when he does his little jiggle dance to music out of the blue. I love his chuckle when I tickle him. It makes you want to just freeze time so that you can hold onto all these things because pretty soon I know it will be another new stage new developments and such is life, time stands still for no man. But just for today thank you that we have what we have and we are where we are right now, for that is what counts the present.
Have a good Wednesday
xxxx